Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Twins

TJ met a friend last night -- a redheaded, freckle-faced, turtle-loving friend named Bryan. I took one look at him and decided he could be TJ's twin...mannerisms and all. Then I found out that he IS a twin, with a sister named Breanne, who loves reading and softball and all of the things MY Bri is into. As soon as they were all introduced, they went upstairs to their bedrooms and I didn't see them for hours.

I met their mom, too. She and her husband just moved here in April from New Jersey. They, too, came from hectic careers, too much commuting and a big mortgage. They, too, wanted a do-over in life. So they're simplifying. She and I spent a couple of hours visiting over a glass of wine last night. And -- get this: she loves margaritas, too!

It's amazing what a difference just one good friend can make. Now I've got someone to show me the shortcuts to Super Target and give me the skinny on local orthodontists. Now TJ's got a buddy to toss a football to. And now Bri's got someone to mentor about life issues and convince that vegetarianism is The Way. (We'll see how that flies.) I'm crossing my fingers that Ryan gets along with the other hubby....then we'll be in business.

The girls had a sleepover at my place. The boys are at the townhome across the street, doing the same. This is bliss.

Bob Marley's song, "Don't Worry About a Thing" comes to mind. So, the washing machine's broken and the house hasn't sold yet. But still, I really think Everything's Gonna Be Alright.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Broken Down

I'm on a roller coaster ride. A few days ago, everything was going as planned. Today, nothing is going right. The offer on our home was withdrawn. The washing machine and dishwasher are both broken. I threw out my back, and Bri's bike was stolen this morning. I am so bummed. I know if I get up and moving outside, my outlook will change. But everything hurts today. Ugh.
Tomorrow's going to be better -- it has to be.

Sunday, June 22, 2008

Enough

I've been purging clothes in my closet and household items I've accumulated over the last 18 years of adulthood. A full 2/3 of what I've owned is now at the local Goodwill, because those things just won't fit in my new surroundings. It feels like I've lost 15 pounds. I can finally see my wardrobe choices, and it feels so good.

When I was 15, chronically tardy for school and full of teenaged rebellion, I was forced to work off my poor citizenship grades by heading out into the wilderness on a hiking expedition called "Survival." All I had with me for a full week was what I could fit into a backpack: A sleeping bag, toothbrush and a change of clothings. There were 20 or so other delinquent students who were in the same boat as me.

For the first couple of days, Survival was sheer hell: tromping through rocky and swampy terrain and building blisters on my heels and feeling the true ache of hunger was more tortuous than anything I'd ever experienced. I was utterly miserable, and I had no other choice than to trudge ahead. But by the end of the week, I'd learned how much I was capable of. I realized how much I'd taken for granted, and most important, how much I can do without and still find a way to be happy. That feeling was like nothing else in the world. Ultimately, I repeated the trip four more times before graduating high school -- voluntarily, as a student expedition leader.

Those experiences got me through a lot of tough times. It taught me about my own strength, about teamwork and determination.

That was 20 years ago, and unfortunately, I've forgotten a lot since then.

I didn't realize that the clutter of things I've accumulated has been weighing me down for years. Which is why it feels so good right now to be able to clearly separate what I need from what I think I want.

I need my sweet hubby -- my best friend for life.
I need my kiddos -- to love, nurture and just be with them is such a privilege.
I need my dear friends -- their unconditional acceptance, wildly unique/entertaining perspectives on life, and sense of humor can't ever be replaced.
I need to explore, to learn, to be open to new ways of thinking, new friends and new possibilities.
I need margaritas. (Kidding -- but not really.)

Tonight, I feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude, peace and calm. All of it is because of the people I love, not the things I've got. I wish I could bottle this bliss and pass it around for all to experience firsthand.

I'd call that potion "Enough" -- and the would always be plenty of it.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Mojo

To my margarita friends:

I have held off from posting since last week, due to superstitions that I may jinx the good news that I am about to announce:

Thanks to you, sisters, and the positive mojo you spread throughout the homestead (and in the ground), we have an offer on our home. WAHOOOOO!!!!! I owe it all to you ladies -- not just the sale of the home, but the wonderful memories you created for me and my kiddos the last night we were together. Bri would not stop saying how cool my friends are -- and I couldn't agree more.

I'm neck-deep in boxes today -- moving day to the semi-permanent spot was yesterday. I have a new phone but am still having trouble finding a signal. Though I have found that if I crawl into the tub in the master bathroom (ha! Master. You should see how big it....isn't) and sit on a pile of towels, I can successfully place a call.

So I'm hoping it'll work today. I'm planning to call in for the Q2 initiative (have y'all changed the name yet?) to thank you for everything. The positive vibes you left at the house, the care package you sent (can I tell you how many items have already come in handy?) and most of all, for the friendships each of you have offered me. I miss you like crazy -- all of you. I don't know how I'm going to deal with not seeing you every day. But the new place is pretty charming, and I'm going to be sure to carve out a little bit of pre-fun for your upcoming visits to see me. :)

Here's to margaritas, mojo and memories. You made it all happen. How can I ever repay?

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Hershey

It's four days into the move. We're still in a temporary place, so it just feels like I'm on vacation. With the kids, the husband, the dog and the turtle.

I continue to be amazed at how much comfort the dog is bringing me. I never considered myself a dog lover (it all dates back to the painful death of a puppy when I was little -- I vowed never to get that close to an animal again), but little Hershey's making me a believer once again. Since I quit my job, he's been by my side every moment. He's my little chocolate shadow -- my buddy who asks for nothing more than a walk and some dinner scraps (and maybe a couple of licks of red wine, when no one's looking). As I write, he's curled under my blanket, his wet nose brushing my leg every now and again to let me know he's right here. Where I need him, for as long as I need him. He's pure, unconditional love -- and I'm grateful to be spending more time with him for a while.

I still miss my margarita sisters. I even miss my job, a little. But I'm finding comfort in the simple things -- my family, my friends and my four-legged friend.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Scootin'

I'm neck-deep in boxes this morning...the time has finally arrived for yet another move. It's exciting to think about the possibilities of a new adventure, but right now I'm lost in the details: disconnecting services, change of address forms, and what to do with all of the random items (loose screws, spare change and the like). My back is killing me.

I know from doing this so many times that it's gonna get worse before it gets better, so I'm gearing up for a challenging 6 months. That's about how long it takes before we start to feel settled. I can't believe I no longer have a job. I miss my friends already. So much is different already. Tomorrow I'll be more positive. Today I just want to be schlumpy.